We’ll Never Be Rested: What if Parents Rewrote the Lyrics to Lorde’s ‘Royals’?

Lorde’s song “Royals” was everywhere in 2013. But my wife and I wondered, what if instead of a 17 year-old superstar, it was overtired parents of young kids who had written this song. The lyrics below are the result. My friend, singer/songwriter Lisa Hillary  recorded our lyrics and it is amazing. Listen to the track and go check out Lisa’s music.

UPDATE: Thanks to fans of the song we now have a video! Check it out.

Rested

Lyrics by Josh Stearns and Erica Carlson

I never set my alarm clock anymore
I wake up before the dawn, I get up early
And I’m not proud of my outfit
It’s three am
And the baby’s screaming

And every minute’s like diapers, Thomas, splashin’ in the bathtub
Juice stains, snack traps, screamin’ in the minivan
They don’t care, we can’t remember the last time we dreamed
But everybody’s like swaddles, white noise, sleeping with your baby
Warm milk, rocking, let them cry it out now
We don’t care, we haven’t slept in a couple years.

We’ll never be rested (rested)
Now that we have kids
That kind of luxe just ain’t for us
We gotta find a different kind of buzz
I drink my coffee (coffee), you can call me sleepy,
And baby I’ll sleep (I’ll sleep, I’ll sleep, I’ll sleep)
Let me live that fantasy.

My friends say that they have cracked the code
They sleep in to 8 am, and go to parties
And everyone who knows us knows, that were losing it
We look like zombies.

And every minute’s like diapers, Thomas, splashin’ in the bathtub,
Juice stains, snack traps, screamin’ in the minivan,
They don’t care, we can’t remember the last time we dreamed
But everybody’s like swaddles, white noise, sleeping with your baby
Warm milk, rocking, let them cry it out now
We don’t care, we haven’t slept in a couple years.

We’ll never be rested (rested)
Now that we have kids
That kind of luxe just ain’t for us
We gotta find a different kind of buzz
I drink my coffee (coffee), you can call me sleepy,
And baby I’ll sleep (I’ll sleep, I’ll sleep, I’ll sleep)
Let me live that fantasy.

(Ooh ooh oh)
Our kids have so much energy
They’re runnin’ circles around me
(Ooh ooh oh)
So you’re sleeping without a care
We aren’t caught up in your love affair

We’ll never be rested (rested)
Now that we have kids
That kind of luxe just ain’t for us
We gotta find a different kind of buzz
I drink my coffee (coffee), you can call me sleepy,
And baby I’ll sleep (I’ll sleep, I’ll sleep, I’ll sleep)
Let me live that fantasy.

….

 

Also check out this terrific rewrite of ‘Royals‘ in the voice of a newspaper curmudgeon by Adrienne LaFrance, with audio from Aaron Edwards. Actual song and lyrics here.

224 Comments

  1. Molly says:

    You need to do a Youtube link for this!

  2. Anibal says:

    Awesome parent of twin babies I totally relate

  3. Jan says:

    wow – love this tune any way but the new words are so much more relatable! and so true! kids…do not equal rest.

  4. BrittH09 says:

    Reblogged this on Call of Doody-Mommy Warfare and commented:
    This is how I feel every single day.

  5. Yup, and then there’s the bedtime fighting years: http://youtu.be/5HA9wro-qc8
    and the poopy diapers: http://youtu.be/kteDWZ4mOk4
    and for all of these things, we all deserve to be Mom of the Year: http://youtu.be/U4jIe4VfajM

  6. spiegelmama says:

    LOVE IT. Good work.

  7. Just excellent. Well done.

  8. Kim Emmons says:

    Great rewrite! Love it!

  9. Ben Lee says:

    Great new lyrics, but this singer goes into different keys. Bad, bad, bad.

    1. Amanda Lew says:

      I agree. The lyrics are awesome, but my musical ears feel very weird and confused after hearing the erratic switches among the keys. And, it’s not only because I know what the original song sounds like.

      1. S says:

        a few key changes became annoying after “.My friends say that they have cracked the code
        They sleep in to 8 am, and go to parties
        And everyone who knows us knows, that were losing it
        We look like zombies…”
        Why the change? Other than that it was a good parody

      2. Jessey says:

        I redid the recording of this song if you want to take a listen!

    2. Totally agree with you.

    3. Jake says:

      Omg I know! My ears were screaming the whole time sing on key please!!!

    4. Steve Weiss says:

      Its cause she’s EXHAUSTED!!!! I couldn’t carry a tune under these conditions either.

    5. Sarah says:

      Yes, this. Love the lyrics but the singer was driving me crazy.

    6. Kelsey says:

      Agreed completely. The lyrics are 100% perfect, but goodness gracious those key changes.

      1. Pat says:

        The lady isn’t trying to be a professional singer, morons!

      2. Kelsey says:

        Actually the singer IS trying to be a professional, moron. She isn’t the one who wrote the lyrics. Read above the lyrics and you will clearly see that.

    7. Elizabeth says:

      Oh my goodness, seriously? It’s a parody, not an attempt to top the charts for musical talent. Plus, she’s tired, get it? Who cares if it’s perfectly on pitch or key, Simon. Just appreciate the humor.

  10. Atif says:

    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

  11. Lawrence Murray says:

    Great re-write, the audio levels are badly off needs fixing and the fluidity of the vocals can be cleaned up a bit more, but the levels are off need to correct the gains of each track. Over all entertaining.

    1. Nathan says:

      I thought this version was way better than the original which was over-produced and over auto-tuned, just like all commercially produced pop music. This was quite a bit more raw and edgy.

  12. shelly says:

    Well I’m a Gramma not a Momma but I was a Momma of three ..ages 0 3yrs. My advice would be. (And by the way we worked too!) Put down the coffee/pc/ipod….turn off the tv. Get those babies outside in the fresh air and tire them out!!! Then everybody sleeps!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    1. JLK says:

      I’m sorry, but I think you may have glossed over the reality of life in those days. My mother admits that after hearing about the issues I have with my daughters, she’s remembered so many things that she had forgotten, especially how often my brother and I wound up awake in the middle of the night. She made us go outside and play for hours every day. Didn’t help. Nightmares happen. Illnesses happen. Growing pains happen…mostly at night. And my children have a lovely way of taking turns with those things to make sure that I never get more than a week’s worth of uninterrupted sleep. I don’t drink coffee. My children don’t have time to play with computers or tablets most days. My oldest daughter is involved in 5 sports clubs at school, takes piano lessons and also makes time for 3 academic clubs. That’s the schedule she created for herself. I don’t sign her up for anything unless she asks me to. In fact, I beg her to drop some of the things from her schedule because I worry she’s going to be too exhausted. She always refuses and so we carry on. Most nights she’s admittedly tired and asking to go to bed by bedtime. And yet, she’s up an average of twice a week with nightmares, nerves about something she has to do the next day, excitement about something she’s going to do the next day, growing pains, etc. I don’t see how pushing her bedtime back when she’s tired and telling her to go outside and get herself more tired is going to magically cure those issues…especially on the days when she’s just come home from soccer practice or baseball camp or whatever and has already been active for an hour or more before we wind her down for bed. Throw in our toddler’s ongoing sleep issues (the child is convinced that she doesn’t actually need sleep…ever…and I have a hard time arguing with her because she’s usually sweet as can be), and I think it’s fair to say that the number of decent night’s sleep I’ve gotten since I became a parent have been few and far between. So you’ll have to, forgive me if I have a hard time believing my problems can all be magically cured by doing more than I already do to make sure that my children are tired at the end of the day. If it really did work for you, great. But I don’t like the way that you’re assuming those of us who aren’t able to sleep as soundly as you remember sleeping are just sedentary people who allow our children to sit around idly.

      1. Kam says:

        Fresh air and exercise are a stress free way to burn energy. Any child signed up for 8 clubs is going to be under a lot of stress and mentally, physically, and emotionally tired out. It may not be your idea to sign her up for everything but you are her parent and as the adult you can decide what you think is best for her and your family. You are right she probably is overly exhausted and stressed. No wonder she has problems sleeping at night.

    2. Lisa says:

      While I appreciate your comment and respect your opinions regarding the great outdoors and its value, I don’t think you understand how much this rewrite speaks to someone like me. First, the great outdoors is COLD right now. Yesterday the high was 18 degrees and that was a heat wave compared to the 5 degrees and below zero marks we’d been heating most of the week. I’m all for outside, but sometimes it’s not workable. I’m the mother of 4 – a teen and triplets who are now 5. Two of my triplets have autism and are about 2-1/2 years behind in development and speak very, very little. Both of my girls with autism tend to sleep restlessly and get away with far less sleep than a neurotypical kiddo would. I am rarely successful at tiring my girls out before they tire me out. But hey, if you want to come over and teach me how to do it all better, you’re welcome to. I’d love the respite 🙂

      1. Lisa says:

        oops – we’ve been having (not heating)! Apparently the cold is also affecting my brain in addition to sleep deprivation!

    3. Gene says:

      You are so write, from Grandpa who was single dad. Find physical activities and mental activities that will tire them so they will sleep when you sleep.

      1. Nathan says:

        Dear People with Good Intentions Who Believe They Have the One Solution to Why Kids Don’t Sleep:

        Below is a list of reasons that I have lost sleep on account of my kids. I don’t think they have anything to do with the technology that does or doesn’t exist in my house (which wasn’t actually mentioned in the song or blog post, so it seems a bit presumptuous to assume that contemporary parents aren’t sleeping because of ipods, television, coffee, etc.), but I will let you be the judge. Incidentally, my house doesn’t have a television.

        1. Ear infections (my 14 month old has had 12–two of which occurred after the ENT specialist inserted tubes in her ears.

        2. Nightmares and night terrors (my 3 year old will sometimes scream for 30 minutes at about 2am. This wakes up everyone except her. It comes and goes in phases. A phase might last 2 weeks)

        3. RSV– a not-so-serious illness for most people, but potentially deadly for infants. Treatment is about 15 minutes with a nebulizer, every 2 hours for couple of weeks. Imagine never sleeping for more than 2 hours for multiple weeks. I got off lucky. I have friends whose babies required surgery in order for them to be able to eat and the babies were slowly starving to death for the first two weeks of their lives and the parents didn’t know why. Aside from the crying, try to imagine the anxiety that that would induce, and what that would do to your ability to sleep.

        4. Metabolism (you may have forgotten that newborns need to eat every couple of hours, and they also poop a lot and that is generally more hygienic to change them when this occurs rather than 8 hours later when it is more convenient)

        5. Object permanence and other cognitive developments (when children learn new tricks their brains sometimes get very active in the middle of the night)

        6. Teething (this is very painful. Each tooth takes a few weeks to push itself through the gums. Babies have 20 teeth). That’s a lot of nights of waking up crying.

        That is an incomplete list.
        Aside from that, it’s really hard to tell kids to go out and play nowadays. I happen to live in a neighborhood with lots of green common areas, but it sleets a lot and the sun sets at 5:30 or 6pm this time of year. It’s hard to take kids out after work and daycare for a long enough stretch to wear them out. I used to live on a busy intersection and we had fire ants in the yard. That was a dangerous environment for kids. I know Josh and his wife and their kids. They have a busy road in front of them, and a forest heavily populated with black bears on the edge of their back yard.

        The point is, please don’t assume that you have the answer to why kids don’t sleep, and even if your answer is valid in many cases, don’t assume that it is a simple idea to implement in practice. Cities look a lot different than they did when you were raising your children 20, 30, or 40 years ago, and society is different. It’s not all about consumer electronics, it’s also about zoning laws and funding for public parks that you don’t have to drive to.

  13. mdobrasz says:

    Hilarious!! Well done!

  14. Yotam says:

    So So True ! ! ! !

  15. OMG this is PERFECT 🙂

  16. Tricia Jorlett says:

    Awesome!

  17. joe public says:

    Suck it up…you chose to have those brats….imagine if everyone would make a remake of a cool song to depict the challenges of their choices….it would be a mess….get over yourselves “parents”…..no one cares

    1. NKidd says:

      Aren’t all songs written about the challenges of people’s choices? Love, heartbreak, drinking, playing, the lives we lead, the wars we fight… isn’t that what songs are?

    2. Beansmom says:

      “….imagine if everyone would make a remake of a cool song to depict the challenges of their choices”
      That would be great! Laughing is an excellent coping mechanism and humor, at its best, brings people together. You can’t relate – that’s fine. Find something you can relate to and laugh already. No one is looking for pity, just a good laugh.

    3. Rachel O. says:

      Wow. Someone is trying to have humor in regards to their choices. I’m fairly certain it was intended for fun, not to seek sympathy for staying up at night tending to their wonderful children, or in your opinion “brats”. I think their version of “sucking it up” is making a fun and silly song and going on about their day.

    4. lifebythelb says:

      wow. you’ve totally changed my life and completely made me rethink my constant mistake of looking at my life through the paradigm of having children.

      (sarcasm. because, really, you kind of just came off as a huge jerk.)

      i certainly hope your worldview isn’t tainted by anything so silly as your life circumstances. we should all make an effort to rise above the life we live and make sure we don’t offend others by being present in our own situations. that would be tragic. it must be so freeing not to have the burden of identifying with any songs because they speak to your life situation. that’s a bliss i, alas, will never know.
      but thank you for sharing your enlightenment with us.

      all of that to say: really?

    5. becks says:

      Go away.

    6. 44c05585 says:

      Well said Joe Public. I get sick of hearing parents complain about how tired they are, how they never have any money, how they cant do this or that. You make the choice to have parents, deal with the consequences of what comes with having kids! Some of us aren’t as fortunate in life to be able to have a family!

      1. Beth says:

        Why are you here watching this? Surely you must have something better to do??? Get over yourself….the song was meant to be FUNNY!

    7. Suck it up? People offer more sympathy when you choose the wrong sandwich at lunch and have to suffer through every $10 bite! Can we please offer each other more compassion in this society? Yes, all of our choices have challenges and the choice to parent is just another choice in life that can be depicted in such a song. I once parodied “We’re not gonna take it,” and it wasn’t about parenting in the least…..that ok??

    8. Beth says:

      Get over your own self…the song was meant to be FUNNY!!! Hello??!! How could you not see that??!

  18. JD says:

    Great lyrics, You need to do a remix to make it better. Parody needs to be spot on of the song.

  19. Nessa says:

    You will sleep again… when they move out.. I promise.

  20. Bob says:

    No one cares, quit breeding, quit bitching.

    1. Beth says:

      Again…why are you here listening to this? Go away if you don’t like it!!

  21. Pointy says:

    I think I got lucky not living in the US. I’ve never heard the original song before. I tried to listen to it using the link from this and just… no. Couldn’t make it through. This version is awesome though. 😀

  22. Stacey says:

    I’m pregnant… think I’ll go to bed now while I can! LOL

    1. Jo Harris says:

      Please! Do it! As an act of solidarity with all those who already gave birth! Maybe when you’ve had your baby someone will do the same for you! 😉 Good luck!
      P.S. It’s amazing how little sleep you actually need to function – you’ll find out just how little soon enough, but don’t worry – there’s always coffee, and it’s a great challenge for your brain to suddenly switch into survival mode.

    2. Carole says:

      You better sleep now!!!!

  23. Brilliant lyrics! I have 8 and 6 year old boys and the 6 yo still wakes up every night. He no longer comes in to us but he is like a herd of elephants going to the bathroom! We honestly haven’t slept a full night since our first was born! Love love love the song. 🙂

  24. Maree says:

    This is great!! Just shared it on my Maree Randle Coaching and Consulting Facebook page!! Love it!

  25. Nicole says:

    This is amazing!!! I have a two year old and five year old and this is my life!!!!

  26. Hahaha! I feel ya!! Great one!

  27. Jake says:

    Definitely a “signer/songwriter” because her singing was so off tune I cringed through most of it lol!

  28. This is brilliant. So relate. I can’t stand the actual song – this version makes me love it!

  29. sexy_boy1973@hotmail.com says:

    i love that song

  30. Kelly Belly says:

    The lyrics are sort of funny, but don’t match the original in meter or rhyme scheme often enough to make this truly clever. And the singing is off-key. I couldn’t make it all the way through; it was too painful. Sorry.

    1. Carole says:

      Yeah . It’s a terrible song. The lyrics are okay. The signing not so much.

  31. Sarah says:

    This is amazing!

  32. maurice jones says:

    The concept and lyrics were ok and slightly clever, but DAMN…. the vocalist can’t keep a key. Very hard to hear.

  33. EHang says:

    Clever, but not difficult.

    -Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe”: Hey, I just made poo, and it was crazy, so here’s my plumber, unclog it maybe.
    -Passenger’s “Let Her Go”: Only know she’s pregnant when she starts to show.

  34. Check out these guys. They take songs like these and re-write the words for kids. Pretty funny: http://www.juiceboxheroes.com

  35. kh says:

    inexplicably i woke up this morning with both this song (well the original) and six little ducks stuck in my head, this version just bookends my day perfectly. thanks for the fun!

  36. HA this is awesome! Momma of 4 here. 10, 6, 4, and 2. LOVE this! I think you are so creative!

  37. how can i download this?

  38. Mariam says:

    I sang it in my head the whole way through! Kudos for this 🙂

  39. marymtf says:

    The first handful of years, the mantra was: if only I could have a good night’s sleep. By the time I did I was on to the next phase and the ones after that wishing I was back to those early days. Welcome to the parenting world. 🙂
    PS. It’s not all stress, there’s lots of lovely memories in between.

  40. marymtf says:

    PS 2, If no one has ;pointed it out to you yet, it’s ‘singer/songwriter’ not ‘signer’. 🙂

    1. Josh Stearns says:

      Thanks! Just updated.

    2. Amy Lee says:

      Actually, she did not write the song, but I did. I am a blacklisted/ghost songwriter who wrote songs for everyone from Aerosmith, AC/DC, INXS, Motley Crue, Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Kiss, Hole, OneRepublic, Def Leppard, U2, Queen, Faith Hill, Shania Twain, Backstreet Boys, New Kids on the Block, Blackstreet, Michael Jackson, Janet Jackson, to Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Pink, and to the recent set of hit makers. My songs have also been used in Broadway plays which includes Phantom of the Opera, Cats, and The Lion King. Most of the songs being released years after I wrote them. I wrote the song Royals due to the Royal family becoming a part of life in 1983 when I was 15.

  41. tisblessed says:

    BRILLIANT!!!! LOL

  42. Margaret says:

    I may be wrong , but I think the folks who wrote the sarcastic remarks were all guys! If so, ladies, I think it makes sense that those dudes are probably guilty for shifting the responsibility of getting up at night to their wives or else they don’t have a clue about what a parent does. I am well past parenting, grandparenting & now great-grandparenting. If I had had an outlet like this as a young mom to share concerns, gripes, etc., I would have LOVED it. So glad you mommies can laugh/console each other. By the way, “this, too, shall pass.” (Remember the last month or two before the baby(ies) were born & you felt like you’d never look or feel ‘normal’ again.)

  43. seemy says:

    brilliant! Brings me back to the first year of both my kids’ lives. Thankfully they both usually sleep through the night now.

  44. Reblogged this on betterthaneverblog and commented:
    A MUST listen!

  45. What fun! I enjoyed this and love a good parody.

  46. aubrierio says:

    i love the song lol

  47. Sing it two me…I have two boys under 4. I’ve forgotten what sleep is…

  48. cupofkt says:

    Reblogged this on cupofkt.

  49. Reblogged this on Hannah Margaret writes… and commented:
    This makes me feel bad for how demanding I am as a child…

  50. chrisnusbaum says:

    Reblogged this on chrisnusbaum.

  51. Atasha says:

    SUCH great lyrics but the singer is pretty off key in many places. I have a youtube channel and I am a singer as well, would love to redo it for you and create a video!
    https://www.youtube.com/user/lilcowgirl54

  52. akr1976 says:

    Reblogged this on tester and commented:
    Nice

  53. ursularosien says:

    It is true, parenting is exhausting and self sacrificing. One of the keys to endure when you are in the “trenches” is community. Friends that are going through the same you are. Family, grandparenst, that if they are able, give a respite to over tired families. We can live such isolated lifes and it can feel like we are the only ones living throughout this early years of parenting. We have 3 children ages 9, 6 and 4 and is a constant labour of “redirecting” their little souls to what is good. Great post!

  54. Matt McClary says:

    Reblogged this on Matt McClary.

  55. Sarah says:

    I burst out laughing and woke up my baby… thanks yall 🙂

    Reblogged… http://blog.sweetbottomsbaby.com/

  56. a.maz.ing. My coworker and I were just talking about parenting today and I think you just about covered it in this amazing song. I hope you get to sleep and dream sometime soon!

  57. ezytask says:

    🙂 This is amazing!

  58. Took me right back to the baby years….Wait! There should be a teenage version! Love it!

  59. Omg love this!!!! Thank you for sharing this post. It’s perfect lol
    http://www.babyandabirkin.com

  60. ohiomommy23 says:

    Reblogged this on ohiomommy23 and commented:
    OMFG I LOVE THIS!

  61. Have Triplets! Love this….

    1. Nice. I’ve had my turn at converting lyrics…it’s great fun and you did a great job. Only thing on the melody. Before posting it on You Tube as was suggested…get a harmony going on the vocal & correct the pitchy areas.

  62. Hilarious! More people need to do this! Will someone try Miley’s Wrecking Ball please!

  63. Bella E. says:

    Reblogged this on experiencing life now and commented:
    This is my first “re-blog” because it is a must hear for any and every parent. I just found my new favorite song, haha! The re-mixer did an awesome job! Now I’ll forever be thinking of this version when I hear the old/real one. Thanks for posting it!

  64. Reblogged this on Latch the Babes and commented:
    Hilarious.

  65. zkmommy says:

    This is AWESOME! As a mother of two kids who are currently under the age of two AND sick, I think this is just what I needed. =) You guys are amazing. Keep it up.

  66. I’m not a parent but this is hilarious and a great cover version! Congratulations on being Freshly Pressed. 🙂

  67. Reblogged this on Keeping up with the French and commented:
    This made me laugh; glad to see some parents are getting creative in their zombie state! Those of you who have kids can relate I’m sure, for those of you who don’t – sleep, sleep now while you can! Have a great weekend everyone.

  68. Vine Vampire says:

    Absolutely genius! I love it ❤ the music actually played in my mind while reading, awesome job

  69. This made me laugh in my zombie state, thank you. Reblogged this on keeping up with the French. Wishing you lots of sleep this weekend! Kirsty x

  70. thebings says:

    As I read this, it’s 3am, and I’m up with the baby. Very timely. Thank you!

  71. Love the new lyrics. I have a puppy who is on reverse hour time clock (sleep by day, play by night).One night, delirious from lack of sleep, I was in my back yard around 4 am watching him chase night bugs as I was singing….
    (to the tune of “Get Lucky” by Daft Punk )
    He’s up all night ’til the sun
    I’m up all night with this one
    He’s up all night for good fun
    I’m up all night with my puppy!!

  72. christinakenny123 says:

    Haha, I love this!

  73. Jessica says:

    I just cried… Somebody gets me!!! This is the best thing ever!!! Love it. 🙂

  74. danielleboes says:

    Absolutely brilliant!

  75. danielleboes says:

    Reblogged this on Butterfly Stars and commented:
    This is brilliant…

  76. aniru919 says:

    Haha I never liked the old lyrics.
    these new ones are hilarious!

  77. conffusedcreations says:

    Amazing, my seven year old loves this song, I am defiantly going to start singing with these lyrics when he puts it on…

  78. Nidhi says:

    hahahahahahaha…..I’m sorry, but it’s been 10 minutes since I last heard the song and I just can’t stop laughing…great job with the song, though.

  79. Libby Kurz says:

    This is perfect. I have three kids…ages 6, 4, and 3, and I’m perpetually exhausted. And…my six year old is obsessed with the song Royals, so this just makes it even better. I think I’ll sing her your version. Thanks for sharing!

  80. dcdear says:

    Father of three boys – totally nailed it! Thanks!

  81. sarah cottrell says:

    Bahahahahahaha!!

  82. marketme1st says:

    Reblogged this on marketme1st and commented:
    This is hilarious. I don’t have kids but this is how I imagine my friends that are pregnant are going to feel in a few months from now. Cool rewrite!

  83. marketme1st says:

    Is there a YouTube vid for this? I want to share it!

    1. Josh Stearns says:

      No video version yet but you can share the audio with this link: https://stearns.wordpress.com/2013/12/04/rested/

  84. Hahaha! That is so funny.

    1. orthodoxmom3 says:

      I sooooo absolutely LOVE THIS!!!!

  85. Oh my! This is TOO funny! I’m not a parent but I can totally see how this would apply! lol

  86. Haha very funny- and the singing voice was lovely 🙂

  87. Genie says:

    If people spent less time on the internet, they would have a lot more time for their children, and rest.
    This is not funny to me, I usually don’t leave a comment that can appear negative, however, I also very, very infrequently go to “Freshly Pressed” and so it seems to me that it’s appropriate to say how I perceive this.

  88. Reu Bard says:

    The Lyrics are more affective to the soundcloud musical remix. Great idea and good on you for being brave enough through the sleep deprivation to post this. New Dad, and up at 2:40am!

  89. Reblogged this on cathywyatt313's Blog and commented:
    Lorde is one of my favourite artists at the moment. I love this cover.

  90. Km42590 says:

    Words are clever, the voice is like death. Had to stop the music and just read.

  91. saeshaneegough says:

    Reblogged this on Saeshanee Gough and commented:
    Genius haha love this.

  92. Brayden says:

    Reblogged this on Brayden Emerick and commented:
    If you have kids, you’ll appreciate this spin on one of 2013 hit songs. 🙂

  93. Brayden says:

    Oh this is my life! Great job!

  94. jazzoli01 says:

    Reblogged this on Sylvester and commented:
    Love this!!!

  95. talksensible says:

    Hahahaha, I was laughing so hard when I read this!

  96. everyblog1 says:

    Reblogged this on It's Nonsense and commented:
    This is just amazing. I’m a big fan of Lorde and especially of this song, but these lyrics are so funny.

  97. Amanda says:

    lol, this is hilarious, spot on true! i got older kids now my oldest near a teenager, can totally relate to this back 10 years ago lol, felt like a robot on ‘programmed mode’ ! it gets better as they get older you’ll be pleased to know, the code thats cracked is has they get older you get to go bed when you want and wake up at 0730 instead of 3am and the weekends even later they as they get older let you sleep in whilst they (the kids) quite happily mess the house up lol, thankfully mine now grown out of this little errm ‘phase’ yay for me those party nights are slooowly coming back to how they was 12 years + ago i’m partying, yeah with my slowly ‘getting there’ older children oh the joys of being a parent lol, a single one in my case at that! love the video it’s awesomengly spot on true p.s- let it be a warning to all you partpeople out there hahaha those party nights come to a sudden standstill when you become a parent 🙂 nice one lol!

  98. Anyone with small children will totally relate to this song!

  99. rezell says:

    Reblogged this on My Life in Flight and commented:
    Love it!! I don’t have children, but all my friends do!!!

  100. Reblogged this on brigittembenyei and commented:
    HAHAHAHAHAHA THIS IS SO FUNNY

  101. Mark says:

    Loved it. All so true.

  102. Just A Guy says:

    Haha… even though she can’t hit the riffs like Lorde this is Amazing

  103. nyfemme says:

    Lol Great Post, hysterical lyrics!
    Here’s my take! (the Kid’s a little older and the marriage ain’t what it used to be!)

    “Will I Ever Be Happpy?”

    I can only recall passion in my dreams
    I’ve hear reports of married bliss, in the movies
    But I’m damn proud of my address
    Oh, the living room, my room, decoration perfected

    But every daydream’s like
    Perfect children
    Healthy meals
    Stressless moments
    Balanced Budgets
    Happy hubbies
    Sex-filled evenings

    But I can’t care, I’m on a treadmill that just won’t stop

    But we all want is
    Cocktails
    Romance
    Loving nonstop for hours
    No bills
    Time out
    Clear blue skies and sunshine

    I can’t care, I’ve got no time to fill that dream
    And we’ll never be happy (happy)
    It don’t run in our blood
    That kind of bliss just ain’t for us, we focus on a different kind of buzz
    That kind of lux just ain’t for us, we crave a different kind of buzz
    Let me be your ruler (ruler)
    You can call me queen bee
    And baby I’ll rule, I’ll rule, I’ll rule, I’ll rule
    Help me find my fantasy.

  104. nyfemme says:

    Reblogged this on nyfemme and commented:
    From Groundswell
    Hysterical take on “We’ll never be Royals”

  105. suzsar says:

    This is awesome!! I don’t have kids yet…. but I’m definitely looking forward to it now >.<

  106. aqilaqamar says:

    Reblogged this on Iconography ♠ Incomplete and commented:
    Cool

  107. coveredhairdontcare says:

    Reblogged this on Covered Hair Don't Care and commented:
    HAHAHA

  108. retwister says:

    Lol I’m just a kid so I can’t relate but this is great!

  109. Very funny! Those baby years fly by…Congratulations on being Freshly Pressed! 🙂

  110. Happy_feet says:

    Should be more for those who work graves as well. LOL Well done!

  111. msdeebs says:

    Reblogged this on msdeebs and commented:
    This is great!!!!!

  112. Jim Rohn was famous for saying “work full time on your job and part time on your fortune.” I think you can still apply this to your situation which is work full time on your job and part time on your craft / talent / passion which in this case writing. Whether you say you are a writer or not, you are correct.

  113. Pingback: NEVER BE RESTED – COVER OF ROYALS « BUZ'N @ 102.9 – New BUZ'N Country
  114. kimjobo says:

    Love this! So funny and unfortunately true!

  115. jsack1 says:

    This song is bloody brilliant. I relate to every single lyric I’ve been on team no sleep for almost 3 years!!!

  116. marinadk says:

    this is great!

  117. mm1066 says:

    Reblogged this on melissamacey and commented:
    An amazing version of Lorde’s Royals written from the point of view of overtired parents.

  118. Tammy says:

    I love your take on this song. I’m not a parent, but I’m going to send this to two friends who are thinking about trying soon. I think they should enjoy their newlywed status a hair longer, and this might help with that. LOL

  119. celimene327 says:

    Reblogged this on Breaking New Ground and commented:
    This is too funny! Great job!

  120. kelseyalana says:

    Well done! I laughed the whole way reading this!

  121. LoopDoodle says:

    This is hilarious!

  122. LoopDoodle says:

    Reblogged this on LoopDoodle and commented:
    Very nice

  123. valleygirlvail says:

    OMG!!! This is the ABSOLUTE BEST thing I have read all day!!!

  124. valleygirlvail says:

    Reblogged this on and commented:
    The best!

  125. yellowdoll says:

    Lol, the lyrics is funny. Probably put off baby-wanters from having any!

  126. professingmotherhood says:

    Reblogged this on Social, Creative, Free and commented:
    This is genius.

  127. Kylie says:

    Now I will always hear these words when that song comes on!

  128. Kel says:

    Awesome, and I can totally relate feel like I haven’t slept in 15 + years.
    Am Sharing with all my friends who agree & love the song. And ill be go eat I’m so out of the loop I didn’t even know the was another version to this parody.
    All the way from Calgary Alberta, you rock!

  129. Reblogged this on lulubellaloveslife and commented:
    Very Interesting. #thoughts

  130. moosufa says:

    Reblogged this on Like a Wave – Believe and commented:
    I have a niece and I can hear my brother and sister-in-law outside of my room since 8 am. Really feel the urge to show this to my sister-in-law, she would find this hilarious!

  131. polacchina says:

    That’s absolutely brilliant! Gonna save this song for the time when I’m gonna live with a fantasy of sleep 🙂

  132. I cannot stop laughing – it is just so true! Great job!

  133. Reblogged this on It's all Relative and commented:
    Love it!

  134. Azure says:

    Looool…im a huge fan of Lorde but this totally beats all…totally

  135. Azure says:

    Reblogged this on Azure Lover and commented:
    The fuss over Lorde’s “Royals” has finally died down but think of it, what if this song was originally written by Tired Adults…lol…I’m quite sure it would have come out this way.

  136. Andra says:

    Loved it! New mom & music lover

  137. stephmardon says:

    Wonderful, thank you! Hope you dont mind me sharing with my Kiwi friends!

  138. stephmardon says:

    Reblogged this on 40 Grains Of Sand and commented:
    Have just listened to this and is so where many of have been recently! I wish I had this talent!

  139. Josh Stearns says:

    Thanks for all the amazing comments and kind words. For those who are interested, I wrote a follow up post to this which is available here: https://stearns.wordpress.com/2014/01/22/i-dont-want-to-be-rested/ In it I discuss why I may never be rested and why that is OK with me.

  140. OMG!!!!! I FRICKIN LOVE THIS!!!!

  141. eastdanielle says:

    I cannot even express how much I LOVE this!!!
    Brilliant!!!

  142. Mom 2 54321 says:

    LOVE IT! MY ANTHEM! 🙂

  143. ladydiega says:

    Reblogged this on I'm just another coffee addict! and commented:
    What Parents can do!!

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